I have faced trauma and adversity that challenged my strength and confidence. I experienced the painful loss of my girlfriend to ovarian cancer, which taught me how difficult it can be to keep going when losing a loving companion.  I remember that day she died. I cried incessantly, faced with feelings of guilt about what I didn’t do when she was living and what I should have done. I wish I had married her. Carrying guilt becomes heavier each day; mourning seems never to end. Turning guilt and mourning into optimism is not like an on-and-off switch. My pain lingers long after her memorial service and burial.